Estate planning is one of those topics everyone means to handle “soon,” and everyone has heard a confident friend repeat a half-true rule that later turns out to be a headache. As a trusts-and-estates attorney (and former Smithfield, Rhode Island probate judge), I’ve seen families pay for these myths the hard way - with avoidable court time, taxes, delays, and fractured relationships.
Below are the ten myths I hear most often in Rhode Island and Massachusetts, what’s actually true, and what to do instead.

1) “Estate planning is only about death and dying.
”The myth. Wills and trusts are for when I’m gone; I’ll worry about it later.
The reality. Great plans are as much about life as death. Incapacity happens - stroke, accident, dementia, a prolonged hospitalization. Without a Durable Power of Attorney, Health Care Proxy, HIPAA authorization, and clear advance directives, your family may need a court-appointed guardian to make routine decisions. That costs time and money and strips away dignity and control.
Do this instead. Pair your will/trust with a complete incapacity toolkit (financial POA, health-care documents, HIPAA, living will). Spell out who decides, how they decide, and what you value so loved ones aren’t forced to guess.

2) “Estate planning is only for the rich.”
The myth. We don’t have a mansion—why bother?
The reality. Probate, medical decisions, guardians for minor kids, who handles your accounts, and how your home passes - all of that matters for all kinds of families. Modest estates can be hit hardest by delays, fees, and disputes. And coordination issues (beneficiary forms, house title, digital assets) don’t care about your net worth.
Do this instead. Get a right-sized plan. Sometimes that’s a will-based plan; often it’s a revocable trust to simplify transfers and keep family business private. Either way, choose people you trust, give them instructions, and align your assets so the paperwork matches the plan.

3) “If I have a Power of Attorney, I’m the executor.”
The myth. My POA lets me handle everything when a loved one passes.
The reality. A Power of Attorney dies when the person dies. It grants authority only during life. After death, only a court-appointed Executor/Personal Representative (or a Trustee under a funded trust) has authority to act. Banks and title companies will (rightly) refuse a POA that’s presented after death.
Do this instead. Make sure the plan names a capable Personal Representative (and backup), and if you use a trust, that it’s funded so the Trustee - who could have also had a POA - can step in seamlessly.

4) “A will avoids probate.”
The myth. I have a will, so the court won’t be involved.
The reality. A will is a ticket into probate, not a pass around it. Because probate is a lawsuit your family brings against itself, using your money, at Fabisch Law, we take the position that parents who love their children don't make them go through probate. In probate, the court must validate the will, appoint your Personal Representative, and oversee required steps. If avoiding court, delays, expense, and public filings is a goal, a revocable living trust (properly funded) is the tool that can keep most transfers off the probate docket.
Do this instead. Decide whether probate avoidance is important for your family. If yes, set up a revocable trust and move assets into it (house, non-retirement accounts). Keep beneficiary designations coordinated so the trust receives what it should.

5) “A revocable living trust gives me asset protection.”
The myth. If I put assets in my RLT, creditors and the nursing home can’t touch them.
The reality. A standard revocable trust is transparent - it’s you with a different set of paperwork. You keep full control, so your creditors (and long-term care cost exposure) see through it. It shines at probate avoidance, privacy, and organization, not at shielding assets.
Do this instead. If asset protection is a goal, talk about irrevocable options (e.g., Medicaid Asset Protection Trusts), timing, and trade-offs. These require careful design and lead time to work; they are not last-minute fixes.

6) “My spouse will automatically get everything.”
The myth. We’re married - problem solved.
The reality. Intestacy (the state’s default plan) splits assets based on whether there are children and/or parents in the picture, and how your assets are titled. Add blended families, pre-marital children, or assets with named beneficiaries, and the result can be very different from what you intended - sometimes triggering a forced sale or family conflict.
Do this instead. Put your wishes in writing. A will or trust can protect a surviving spouse and children (including from a prior relationship), stage distributions over time, and avoid accidental disinheritance.

7) “I can wait until I’m older (or sick) to plan.”
The myth. I’ll get to it when things slow down.
The reality. The law cares about capacity. Every week I get calls from people asking me to prepare POAs for family members who can no longer sign them. If an illness strikes or cognition slips, you may no longer be able to sign documents - forcing a guardianship. Some goals (like Medicaid planning or gifting) require years of lead time, and the best long-term care insurance is bought while you’re insurable.
Do this instead. Plan while you’re healthy and decisive. You’ll have more options, less pressure, and lower cost.

8) “I’ll just add my child to the deed/bank account to ‘avoid probate.’”
The myth. Joint ownership is the simple shortcut.
The reality. Adding a child can be a gift with tax and Medicaid implications, can forfeit a step-up in basis (raising capital gains later), and exposes your home or money to your child’s creditors, divorce, or poor decisions. It also risks disinheriting other children or creating ugly family accounting after you’re gone.
Do this instead. Use a revocable trust or beneficiary designations aligned with the plan. If you truly need a joint account for convenience, keep it small or use a convenience signer arrangement where available, not true ownership.

9) “Beneficiary designations always solve it.”
The myth. I named people on my IRA and life insurance; I’m covered.
The reality. Beneficiary forms are powerful-but blunt. They override your will/trust, can become outdated, don’t protect minors (who can’t receive directly), and can disqualify a special-needs beneficiary from benefits. Post-SECURE Act, retirement account payouts are more complicated, and the “just name the kids” approach often leads to preventable tax and timing problems.
Do this instead. Coordinate designations with your estate plan. Use a trust for minors, special-needs beneficiaries, or where you want timing/control. Review designations after life events and at least every few years.

10) “Once I sign, I’m done.”
The myth. The binder goes on the shelf; mission accomplished.
The reality. Two words: funding and maintenance. A trust that isn’t funded doesn’t avoid probate. Real estate needs new deeds; accounts need to be retitled or have the trust listed as beneficiary where appropriate. And life changes-marriage, divorce, a new baby, selling a house, changing states-can silently break a once-great plan.
Do this instead. Treat estate planning like a system, not a document. Fund the trust. Keep an asset spreadsheet. Align beneficiaries. Put a reminder on your calendar to review every 3–5 years or after major life events.

Quick Reality Checks on Your Shortlist

• “Estate planning is only about death.” Wrong. Incapacity planning is half the battle.
• “Estate planning is only for the rich.” Wrong. It’s about people and process, not net worth.
• “POA = executor.” Wrong. POA ends at death; court appointment begins after.
• “A will avoids probate.” Wrong. A funded trust avoids probate; a will does not.
• “RLT = asset protection.” Wrong. For protection, think irrevocable (with trade-offs and timing).

If you see yourself in any of these myths, you’re not alone, and you’re not behind. You just need a plan built for your family, assets, and goals, with Rhode Island/Massachusetts quirks accounted for and the paperwork matched to the strategy.

How we make this easy

1. Clarity first. We start with your people, your “must-haves,” and your “never-agains.”
2. Right tool, right job. Will-based or trust-based, with the incapacity documents every adult needs.
3. Funding & follow-through. We help align titles, deeds, and beneficiaries so your plan actually works.
4. Check-ins. A light maintenance rhythm keeps your plan current as life changes.

If you’re in Rhode Island or Massachusetts and want a plan that avoids court detours, protects the people you love, and keeps family peace, let’s talk. We’ll cut through the myths, give you a straight path, and do the heavy lifting with you.
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By Matthew Fabisch, Esq. - Former Rhode Island Probate Judge • Founder, Fabisch Law • Trusts & Estates Attorney • Father of Four

Massachusetts and Rhode Island living trust lawyers provide help in planning ahead in case of incapacity. Though no one wants to think about it, illness or an accident could leave you incapacitated and unable to manage your own affairs. When this happens, it is helpful to have a plan in place to ensure that someone you trust will immediately begin to take control over your money and property. 
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Fabisch Law Offices attorneys can work with you to identify the right tools to use to plan ahead for incapacity. Typically, a plan for incapacity should include, at minimum, an advanced directive or health care proxy, to allow someone to make medical decisions in accordance with your wishes, and a financial power of attorney, to allow someone to manage your finances. But while a healthcare proxy and financial power of attorney can be helpful both for making advanced plans for medical care and for giving someone authority to make decisions on your behalf, many people also choose to consider a living trust as part of their incapacity plan. Our Massachusetts and Rhode Island living trust lawyers explain how living trusts work, why they are a valuable part of your incapacity plan, and how we can help you with trust creation. To find out more, give us a call today.

Why Should a Living Trust be Part of Your Incapacity Plan?

A living trust, also sometimes called a revocable trust, is a trust that you create during the course of your lifetime. You can manage the assets that are held in the name of the trust and you have control and flexibility that you would not have with other types of trusts, such as an irrevocable trust.
Though a living trust will not keep your trust assets safe from creditors or to shield those assets from counting if you need to qualify for Medicaid to pay for nursing home care, a living trust will be helpful in case of incapacity because you can name a backup trustee.

The backup trustee can immediately take over the management of the trust assets if something happens to you. You will not need to worry about the delays that can come with a guardianship or conservatorship, while a court determines if you are incapacitated and who should be the guardian of the assets that you own. Instead, the backup trustee can immediately move to keep the wealth that you transfer into the trust safe by managing it in an effective and appropriate manner if something has happened to you.

In addition to providing flexibility and safekeeping during your lifetime, your living trust can also be helpful after you pass away. Assets that are held within the living trust will not need to pass through the probate process, which is a lengthy and expensive process that can leave an executor in charge of assets for many months or years instead of the heirs or beneficiaries who will become the new owner of those assets.

While there are other tools that can, and should, be part of an incapacity plan, because of the substantial benefits that a living trust provides, many clients choose to include this type of trust in their plan. Let Fabisch Law Offices help you to decide if you want to make a living trust part of your incapacity planning tools.

How Can Massachusetts and Rhode Island Living Trust Lawyers Help You?

Massachusetts and Rhode Island trust attorneys can work with you to understand the risks to your wealth and independence in case of incapacity. Some assets must be more carefully managed than others, for example, and the creation of a living trust can be especially important under these circumstances.

We can also help you to follow the formal process required to create a trust and can guide you through the process of funding your trust (putting the assets you want to protect, into the trust) with the assets that you are trying to protect. Your backup trustee will be the person who takes control over the trust assets if something happens to you, so our legal team will also explain the duties of the backup trustee and help you to determine who is best suited to this position based on the responsibilities that the trustee will have in case you become incapacitated.
Contact Massachusetts and Rhode Island Living Trust Lawyers Today

The Massachusetts and Rhode Island living trust lawyers at Fabisch Law Offices can provide you with the help that you need to figure out if creating a trust should be a part of your incapacity planning. We can also work with you to identify other incapacity planning steps that you should take in order to protect your wealth and maintain your independence as long as possible in the event something happens to you.

To find out more about living trusts and other legal tools, including financial powers of attorney, healthcare proxies, and medical orders for life sustaining treatment that you can use to plan ahead in case of incapacity, give us a call at 401-324-9344, or contact us online to get personalized help with your incapacity planning and with your trust and estate plan creation process.